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Thursday, February 17, 2011
how am i to smile and actually speak to someone whom i utterly depise and am sorely disappointed in? must i force myself to put on that smile everyday? that'll be so hypocritical... can't believe i'm actually entering the stage in life whereby you have to "smile no matter how much you dislike the person in front of you"
so tired of seeing how ppl can twist words and malign anyone just to get what they want. customer service is a fugly line to get yourself into. i'm so tired, i wish i can just stop now... it's draining the life away from my smiles.. i'm no longer smiling cos i feel like smiling and am genuinely happy, i'm just hanging that plastic smile on my face just cos i have to, the smile's there cos it's expected of us, we're ordered to smile... "Greet the patients, smile... " and the long list goes on...
I remembered that one patient commented on my first week of work, "you must be a new staff here." i asked her how did she know and she replied, " cos you're still so lively and excited about your job! keep up the good work and your smile alright?" i told her i will... haha, and now i know how hard it is to keep that promise. haha, i guess i will be able to tell if a staff is new to a job quite well now. i will tell her the same thing that the patient told me 2 months ago... cos i want her to know that i appreciate her service and i don't take it for granted. cos she might be feeling sick and ill and no one gives a damn and pays her a meagre pay and expects a 5-star hotel kinda service. i don't want this kinda misfortune to befall anyone.
i'm disgusted by ppl. just wanna shut myself away from this fugly world, away from all these fugly ppl. i don't care if i'm deemed as a weakling, i'm just damn freaking tired...
just another observation of this fugly world: if you don't have power or authority, you'll just get trampled on, and it's a very real situation happening in our society and other societies alike i suppose. you won't have a voice, you are just a nobody. i suppose i understand the rationale behind all the power struggles happening and why they exist. if you don't get a share of the power, someone else will and you'll get ordered around endlessly...
so tired... i'm looking forward to my break. i don't know if i should still feel optimistic, maybe smth good will come out of this?
Journey through this phase of my life @ |{11:36 PM|
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